Friday, September 23, 2011

Help Mate, not a Mother

What a weird feeling!  Here I am alone at home again, but it's not because Bruce is in the hospital.  Those days, Lord willing, are behind us.   

Yesterday, Bruce left at 8am and didn't come home till 9pm.  Today, I am missing him again, but at the same time, I am thrilled to know he is once more able to hold a position of authority without me tagging along at his side for support.

Bruce is the Deputy Returning Officer for an advanced pole in our provincial election.  He will be working long hours for six days, running the advanced poling station and then counting ballets on voting day.  This will be the most we have been separated since he was in the hospital.

Although his dementia is gone, he has still felt the need to have me close at all times.  This week he is overcoming that, and, I think, enjoying the feeling of being the man in charge once again.

We had expected to be working together.  When we applied for the job, we applied as a team, but when we signed up for advanced poling I hadn't realized that it would involve so many days.  When we found out what was involved, Bruce still wanted to do it even though I couldn't. (I homeschool our Grandkids and didn't want to take that much time off.)

Maybe it was the Lord's way of giving him a little push.

And ...  maybe it was the Lord's way of forcing me to let go.

A man with dementia is like a child that needs mothering.  A man whose mind has been healed needs a wife; a help mate, not a mother.

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